Halloween 2007: 101.7 Degrees

Medical Update Below

Fortunately, this was after trick or treating. Well... it perhaps wasn't fortunate for all the people she came into contact with. I feel so bad for her, she is really in a bad state. Her head hurts, her tummy hurts, her throat hurts, she can't get comfortable. Poor Supergirl! There must have been some Kryptonite in the candy!

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The next day...

Marley's fever continued to rise last night and it was clear she was in a very sorry state. Because we knew there had recently been a couple of cases of strep throat in her class, we took her in to the doctor first thing this morning. With a temp of 103 (45 minutes after acetaminophen), a red, swollen, pus-y throat, swollen glands, and a headache, the doctor felt comfortable diagnosing strep throat without doing a throat culture. He's been Marley's doctor since the day she was born and has been through her febrile seizures and the resulting antagonism she has felt for anyone in a white lab coat since then. She handles things much better now, but the doctor told me that in addition to her having every clinical sign of strep, it was also Marley--which I took as meaning that he knew she would not easily allow her throat to be swabbed.

So, after 48 hours on antibiotics or 24 hours without fever, she'll be cleared to go back to school.

Yeah Cefzil!

I fell in to a burning ring of fire...

I was wrong.

There are not fires to the north, south, and west of me.

There are fires to the north, south, west, AND east of me.

Lest you become too alarmed. I cannot see any fire. I cannot see any smoke.

But I can smell smoke. The Air Quality Management District is advising all people to stay indoors as much as possible. The kids have to have recess, lunch and P.E. inside. Can you imagine how much fun their teachers are having?

Here is a handy little fire map I downloaded from a news site. I drew a wobbly little star in MS Paint to show our approximate location. We truly are in the middle of a ring of fire.



One thing on my mind during all this, other than my burning eyes and lungs, is all the firefighters who are working so hard and who are so overextended. A state of emergency was called for Southern California today. There are too few resources to fight this many fires, over such a large area, all at the same time. I'm not Catholic, but I might just ask the patron saint of firefighters, St. Florian, to intercede on behalf of the men and women of the California Fire services.

So much life, so lttle time to blog...

Life has been busy. This news is no surprise as I've been droning on and on about it for weeks and weeks.

It's good, but it doesn't allow for much bloggy relationship building.

So, here are a few bullet points:

Izzy the Incredible just did a blog makeover for me at my family blog: So Cal Cinema. Check it out when you have a chance. It is very retro and fun and just my style.

While I still have a lot to do for school, my first ginormous paper is turned in. I don't know what grade I'll get, but I'm getting to the point where an assignment is not inducing quite so much intestinal distress. I'm proud of the preparation and work I did on the paper and I hope the teacher appreciates it, too!

There's been no time to bake up a Sleeping with Bread post, but I did make a cake from a mix and my daughter says I am the best cook ever. (Oh! How low the standards of a seven year-old!)

I'd love to start a series based on my Surprised by Waltzing post. I got the idea after watching Superman: Doomsday with Marley. (Slightly inappropriate at times, I have to say.) In the special features of this recently released animated movie, the decision to kill Superman in the comics and how they brought him back to life elicited that feeling of joy in me which I described in the waltzing post. The community of the team working on it moved me. The emotional involvement the artists and writers still feel is incredible. There are a couple of occasions where they are moved to tears as they describe scenes from the comics. Tears formed in my own eyes as I watched. You never can tell when joy is going to jump up and get your attention.

As if there were any need to confirm my geek status, I watched Transformers the Movie... and of course, I loved it. Optimus Prime is the coolest AutoBot ever!

Fires are raging -- all around us here in So Cal. We are literally ringed with fires to the North, South and West of us... probably to the East as well but I'd have to look it up to be exact. There are other parts of the country where you experience the smell of fire entwined completely with the air and ash adrift on the wind. I don't know how many places, though, experience this once to twice a year. This is a particularly bad batch of fires. At least one area is burning thanks to the sick minds of one or more arsonists. This is also the first time that I know someone who had to evacuate. Fortunately it was just for a few hours. The wind was so fierce last night that we lost a portion of the fence and some shades. A neighbor lost a tree. People are encouraged to stay inside and use the recirculate function on their air conditioning units.

It is definitely Fall in So Cal.

Life, the Universe, and Everything: Friday Night Catch Up

Life:

I promised to be back Friday and I sometimes keep my promises.

My brain is still drained, sprained and otherwise constrained.

Still, I soldier on...

The week really hasn't been that bad. Mostly, I am just tired. I spent about 11 hours working on a paper last Sunday (insert impressed noises here) and when I went to bed for the night, the body was willing but my brain was like a frozen computer and I couldn't find the Ctrl-Alt-Del keys. I finally went to sleep at 4:00 a.m. If this is the impact that paper writing has on me, I'm going to have to have a writing curfew to allow for four hours recovery time. The rest of the week involved extra hours at the church office, catching up on sleep, Paul traveling, etc.

This morning I woke up after some fitful sleeping and thought to myself that I didn't see how I could possibly put clothes on, make lunches, and drive the kids to school.

So I didn't.

We had in impromptu LUE family vacation day. It was AWESOME!!! Why was it awesome? Because the kids got along all day and I was able to leave Marley with Colin while I went to the chiropractor and store. After I got home, I lazed around in my pajamas, watching tv and napping off and on. HEAVEN!!

Of course, there was a cloud to my silver lining. Marley was too well-behaved, too cooperative, and too self-sufficient. It couldn't last and it didn't. But that's okay. She's bathed and waiting for Daddy to come home with her Krazy Kryptonite purchased from THE BIGGEST MALL IN THE WORLD!!!!

the Universe:

I officially do not know what is going on in the universe. Last night, my bleary eyes were scanning internet headlines and I found myself reading headlines which were follow ups to news stories I wasn't familiar with.

I think this might be a grad school phenomenon.

Everything:

BubandPie tagged me for a book meme and because I am at reduced capacity, I am going to do it in installments.

Installment One:

What was the last book I read?

Of Human Bondage by W. Somerset Maugham. I recently read The Painted Veil and loved it, so when this selection came up for my book club, I was excited--until I saw the 600 pages or so I had to read. It took me quite a while to plow through this book, but it was definitely worth the effort. Philip Carey grew on me and I found myself alternately frustrated at him for spending too much money or going back to Mildred or broken-hearted for him because of the lack of warmth and understanding in his life. The historical context interested me also with references to the rise of the German philosophers, changes in religious thought toward the end of the 19th century, and post-Impressionism in France.

Stay tuned for installments Two through Six: Five Meaningful Books I've Read.

Ugh...

Brain hurts.

Body tired.

Can't form sentences.

Just drove through KFC to get a chocolate cake. Needed chocolate. Bad.

Marley asked for a side of macaroni and cheese to go with the ramen I was making for her.

I guess we've been to KFC too much lately.

Big paper due on Thursday. Be back on Friday.

Surprised by Waltzing

Sometime in the first year after I graduated high school, I read Surprised by Joy: The Shape of My Early Life by C.S. Lewis and his definition of joy as "an unsatisfied desire which is itself more desirable than any other satisfaction" captivated me. Joy, to Lewis, was a feeling inspired by any number of things from encounters with nature to the sound of friends' laughter. Eventually, as he sought out these moments of joy, he began to believe the emotion he was experiencing was a recognition of the divine which creates in us a longing for God.

At 18, I sensed the truth in his words. I knew that joy as he described was different than the happiness we are often taught should be our life's aim.

At 18, I felt I had experienced those longing glimpses into the divine.

I'm sure I had, but as I reflect on my life with its grown up burdens and responsibilities... as I consider the sad and tragic circumstances that can befall people, those glances of joy are more poignant to me. Sometimes they are almost boringly obvious: the heart-bursting ache that comes with a glance at my son or daughter; the gasp that comes with the sight of the local mountains, freshly covered in the snow after a storm. I think these are universal experiences which don't lose their depth of meaning in their prevalence.

Sometimes, though, I get that sense of Beauty and Longing in places I wouldn't expect. Today, Sober Briquette picked up on a recent post of mine in which I chose a shopping cart to represent myself in a transportation metaphor. Her choice is great and the options she eliminates along the way are very funny. At the end she embedded a You Tube clip of Van Morrison singing with The Band from The Last Waltz.



The Last Waltz has been on my mind of late. We have the DVD and Colin recently purchased The Band's Greatest Hits (along with The Best of Sam & Dave, Wilson Pickett's Greatest Hits and Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band--this kid has great taste in music). The film brings back fond memories. The first time I watched it was the first time Paul and I discussed forever. But more than that, the film and the music in it evokes in me a sense of the sublime. It is just so good it almost hurts--that good hurt.

Here's where my descriptive powers will fail me. How do I go beyond the Valley Girl-like "It's so awesome!!!" to communicate how the interviews with the members of The Band, along with the footage of amazing musician after amazing musician singing and playing with the band is just a little slice of heaven here on earth? How can I explain that I see God in the community these men had with each other or that the musicianship seems to be the quintessential example of being in the moment with the music? I don't know.

I'm not really a music person. I like lots of music but I don't pursue music in my life and I'm not musically literate. I can't tell you anything about what makes a good song. There's something more than music going on in The Last Waltz, though, and it surprised me with joy.

Sleeping with Bread: Better Late Than Never

I don't know quite what happened on Monday but I did not get my Sleeping with Bread post written.

Well, I do know what happened. Life happened. School happened. Sleep happened.

So I find myself with a few moments to reflect and I ask myself...

When in the last week (or so) have I found consolation?

1. meeting with my friend with whom I do my spiritual formation exercises


2. taking time to spend with book club friends discussing Of Human Bondage


3. watching Marley and Colin play outside together yesterday


4. praying the prayer offices from the Northumbria Community


5. getting some reassurances in different places and from different people that I just might manage this school thing


6. watching Heroes (remember I'm a minor sci-fi/fantasy geek)


7. we almost have enough money saved to renew our Disneyland passports (This is something that we can do as a whole family and anytime you can amuse both your 7 year old and your 15 year old, it is worth doing.)

When in the last week (or so) have I found desolation?

1. not spending enough time with my family


2. stressing over a 'B' for a paper and totally overcompensating on the next one (I'll have to sneak in another consolation here to say that the professor gave everyone a chance to rework the next one and I figured out the 'B' was for something very minor that is easily corrected in the next one.)


3. a couple of things which I'm not at liberty to discuss in a public place but which are both saddening and stressful


4. missing out on a movie with a friend because I forgot I had book club


5. loss of sleep due to minor vomitage by daughter


6. minor physical ailments which are more irritating than serious

Further Contemplations

All in all, it seems that each week since I began grad school I have learned something new about managing my life.

Last week, I learned that my brain will not meet the challenge of reading two chapters, back to back, of Content Area Literacy. Application? Don't save all that reading for the morning before class.

Over the course of the last few weeks, one question I started to ask myself and I think, after this week, I'm finding the answer is this:

Is this rollercoaster of stress that I am experiencing since starting school a natural response to my situation or is it just me and that peskly personality of mine not responding well to it all?

The conclusion I'm coming to? Yes, it is stressful for a 42 year old woman who hasn't been to school in 17 years to find herself in a graduate program for which she lacks a lot of the essential background of teaching experience. However, after stressing out for a day because I got a 'B' on a two page paper, upset that I was two points below the class average, and contacting the professor to ask for his suggestions before the next two page paper was due, I suspect that the hills and valleys I've been experiencing relate more to my own issues and personality. Application? I need to get a grip and settle down. I need to stop looking at every (perceived) setback as "THE END OF MY GRAD SCHOOL CAREER!" My body can't take it. My heart can't take it. And, I most assuredly know that my family can't take it! (Poor things. Psycho Mommy is scary!)

And so, as Picard might say to Riker, I just need to "make it so." (I told you I was something of a scifi/fantasy geek!)