In which I offend purple-wearing old folks. . .

When I Am Old I Will Wear Clothes Appropriate for My Age!

When I am an old woman,
I shall clothes wear clothes appropriate for my age - -
With or without a hat as long as it goes,
and looks good on me.
And I shall spend my money
on books and movies
(and maybe a trip to Ireland)
and probably more and more skin care products,
because, DANG, it was easier to be holier-than-thou when I was 20 and wrinkle-free.
I shall sit where ever I can find a comfortable seat when I'm tired
and Lord help me, if I am gobbling up samples in shops
without regard to my health
and thinking I can still be as active as a young person,
while forgetting what it was like to be young and stupid.
I won't mind wearing my slippers in the rain but hope that
I only pick flowers in other people's gardens if I have permission
and NEVER learn to spit!
I don't want to wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
and eat a pan of brownies all by myself,
or only bread and butter for a week,
and collect coat hangers
and sugar packets and Styrofoam popcorn.
I have responsibilities now like raising my kids,
and paying my bills,
and not driving while talking on my cell phone,
and setting a good example for the children.
But I enjoy having dinner with friends and talking about things.
And I don't want to be a different kind of person
So that people who knew me are shocked and surprised
when suddenly I am old, and stop acting like myself!